After the Race

So what happens next for Tri-Kate????
I was pretty sure that I would only want to keep going farther and do a longer Olympic Distance next....well I think what I learned is that what I should do is improve my sprint distance first. I definitely want to keep doing races and I think build up until I am finishing a sprint with everyone else not after them!
I haven't found the next race yet but I will.

So to finish up the personal journey I was also on. I think what I found through all this is myself again. As I said before I came out of my marriage pretty messed up and definitely felt like a lot of what I thought was my life was myth and lost a huge sense of my identity. I even said on more then on occasion I was treding around in murky waters trying to find a grasp on a way out and to find myself. I definitely had very low self esteem and not much self worth.
God had given me the verse Psalm 147:3 He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds, a very long time ago. I honestly at the time was in so much emotional pain I can't even begin to explain or currently phathom what it was like. I really never believed that the way I felt would change.
Before I started the training God had definitely started a work in me. He kept telling me over and over that I was so beautiful to Him. Ok so I got that message and really let go of any hang ups I had about how I looked (remember I am a curvy girl).
So maybe I needed that confidence to not care about getting in spandex and going to the gym.
The next thing was the worship. When I was working out I was listening to worship for hours and hours, and praying finally talking to Him again. Not that I totally stopped but I would say our reletionship had been very strained. Those times when I was alone (in a gym full of people or at the lake or bay or around my neighborhood) He washed away the pain, He binded up my wounds. I slowly started to have my joy back. I started to just have life back in me.
It seems so deep the way I write it and odd to me because I don't think I even realized what was happening inside me during it all. I just know at some point I stopped crying as much all the time, and being sad about my losses. Hope for my future took place of it. Pride and my worth in Him rose to the surface of all the lies.
I think people that knew me well before during and after would testify that something happened in me through this that was a miracle. I am lively, happy and totally feel like myself but a new self :)